Sometimes, when the going gets tough, I ask myself “what’s the point of going on?”. Usually there would be something. However, these days, it seems like even the little things in life can’t keep me motivated anymore.
I don’t game like I used to – I log on, do my daily heroic and any dungeons I can get into… and that’s it. I seldom have the mood to set up raids or even just join them. I don’t try to mix-max. Daily quests? Hah! Often, I just log in and alt-tab out to surf the internet and watch dramas, which brings me to my next point.
Internet and dramas. These days, there’re few show that interest me. IRIS is blocked and I still haven’t found a good and reliable place to watch it from. My Girl (TV Asahi) is nice but the subbing is really, really slow. The others? Probably already watched them, or have no interest in. Meh. I don’t even use the internet for much these days – Facebook for mafia wars and cafe world… onemanga once in awhile… wow.com when I actually bother to remember… foruming is a thing of the past.
Friends. Those few I still keep in contact with are busier with other things. Girlfriends. School. Stuff. Gee, it’s hard to keep in contact let alone meet up frequently. I’m actually to start feeling lonely lolwhut.
Annabelle. My little bundle of joy. Some times, she’s the only one that keeps me going. I absolutely adore her and give in to her pretty much of the time. I know that as her uncle, I’m overtly doting on her but hey… my niece’s my niece and who’s to stop me from treating her the way I want to? Often when I’m out and I see something she might like, I actually stop in my tracks and pause to consider if I should get it for her. Often, when it seems like there is nothing else to live for, she reminds me that I do.
So why exactly do I keep going on? What’s there to live for?
I wonder.
